Greenfield Gerbil 2.1
A humor column with ideas taken from real life. Poke fun at reality with rural Massachusetts' favorite rodent.

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March 22, 2001
Gerbil Founder Recently Near Greenfield
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GREENFIELD, MA: Gerbil Founder and Editor in Chief Tim B. Gegato was recently spotted in West Springfield, Massachusetts, a mere 35 miles from the newspaper's headquarters.

Map displaying the route Tim Gegato would have taken from West Springfield to Gerbil HQ.

Acting Editor Jack Finch temporarily vacated Gegato's office in preparation for the Chief's first visit to the newsroom in the paper's history. "I got a little freaked, to be honest," Finch revealed. "I just finished eating all of the Hershey's Kisses his secretary puts on the desk, and I hadn't even begun to scrape the Ked marks off his blotter."

"Mr. Gegato is a very busy man," explained his executive assistant, Mary Jane Delacroix. "His love of this paper keeps him so busy, scouring the globe for news, that he simply hasn't the time to come to the office. Or check his messages. Or collect his mail. Or provide news stories during any given February."

Gegato was unavailable for comment, though a personal spokesperson said that he will be sure to announce with at least a week's notice should he come within 50 miles of the Gerbil's offices again.